![]() ![]() Alas, Anne's look of castrating contempt made him spend the rest of the evening with his knees girlishly clamped together.īrandreth's wishful thinking about his intimacy with the Windsors licenses such friskiness. On another occasion, he pressed his thigh against Princess Anne's under a dinner table. Empowered to speak on behalf of the royal bladder, he officiously replied: 'She's fine, thank you.'īrandreth even seems to have been sexually stimulated by proximity to the starchy monarch, and once ineptly flirted with her at a Buckingham Palace reception. ![]() This is a man who, while researching his novelettish tome, danced such obsequious attendance on the Queen that a helper at a hospice she was visiting took him for an equerry and asked if his employer needed the loo. It's the kind of imagination a snob possesses, elated by a dizzy dream of high society and of his own exclusive access to it. Indeed his entire biography of the pair can best be read as the product of a sweatily over-heated imagination. ![]() How does Brandreth know this? He doesn't, of course, as he at once admits: the tongue-tied dialogue he writes for the two teenagers is entirely invented. He said: 'How do you do?' She replied: 'I'm quite well, thank you.' Oh, she also thought he looked 'achingly handsome'. ![]() So now we know - thanks to the prurient intercession of that woolly-pullied royal plaything Gyles Brandreth - what happened when the virginal Lilibet met her nautical Adonis at Dartmouth in 1939. ![]()
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